We hosted three of my old school friends and their families for lunch on Sunday. This slightly rash invitation followed one of our regular girls' nights out in London. The next morning, I woke up, did some fairly basic maths and announced to Reuben that I hope he didn't mind too much but I'd just volunteered him to cook lunch for 17.
Thankfully he is an optimistic soul and muttered something about it being just like a normal Sunday roast "but, with a bit more food".
Along with many small children, interesting conversation, chocolates, a few bottles of wine and some champagne, one of our guests also brought us the object photographed above.
As Rolf Harris might say "Can you tell what it is yet?".
It is in fact a Brazil Nut, bought over (some might say "smuggled" but let's not dwell on that) direct from its namesake. Yes, what we call Brazil nuts are actually the seeds which you find, arranged like segments of an orange, when you crack open the nut itself.
It is now, officially, my favourite present ever given by a guest (and need I remind you that, as they also bought champagne, this is praise indeed).
It is also a brilliant "horticultural show off" item which is going to seriously up our ante at the school show and tell session (this is not hard - Oscar's most recent item was a trophy won two years ago for the village three-legged race).
Here are just some of the incredible things about Brazil nuts:
They are pollinated by long-tongued orchid bees
Brazil nut trees can grow 50 metres tall and, given these nuts are both very hard and quite heavy, walking underneath them can prove fatal
The nuts are radioactive (I'm not making this up, I promise)
But most interesting of all is watching your slipper-clad husband try to open them with a block hammer and chisel whilst guests look on and give amazingly ineffective advice.
Fascinating. So, did he manage to chisel it open? He should have tried tapping and unwrapping.
Posted by: Jo | February 02, 2012 at 03:03 PM
Jo - No, but I did! *smug look*
Posted by: Dawn | February 02, 2012 at 03:05 PM
You have a husband who wears slippers? He seems very nice and everything too...but surely he's 30 years to young by the looks of him (not for you, for slippers I mean)
Posted by: Mark D | February 02, 2012 at 06:33 PM
Mark - I'll admit, they aren't doing a great deal for his image. However, in his defence, they are 'Homey' slippers which, apparently, is quite a "cool" slipper brand (surely an oxymoron?)
Posted by: Dawn | February 02, 2012 at 06:47 PM
If he matched those slippers with a pair of scarlet cords he'd be my hero.
Posted by: Lesley Chapelles | February 02, 2012 at 07:55 PM
Lesley (for that is what I will call you), please don't encourage him. It won't end well...
Posted by: Dawn | February 02, 2012 at 08:03 PM
"Do its bum hole, you know: the other bit"
I must congratulate you on the worldly sophistication of your friends....
Posted by: James A-S | February 04, 2012 at 03:12 PM
James - More worryingly, she's a respected journalist. I think, perhaps, time spent in my company has a detrimental effect on those around me.
Posted by: Dawn | February 04, 2012 at 06:06 PM